I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
