Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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