Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
