Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
