i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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