I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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