Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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