.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
