Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
