Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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