i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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