Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
