whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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