i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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