if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
