You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
