I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize