last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
