I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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