She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
