Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
