Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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