apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
You know, be my cock's hype man.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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