Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
