In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize