there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
