If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Life is so much better after having sex.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
