i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
