You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
