Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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