A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
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