Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
