I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
