Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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