Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
