is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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