Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
