Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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