Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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