Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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