the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
