Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
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