Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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