Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
is it fun? or sober?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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