I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
