I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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