i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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