Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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