You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I'm jealous of your bromance
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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