White coat. Heels.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
